The Four Feelings of a Secure Relationship

The Four Feelings of a Secure Relationship


I’ve heard a lot of definitions for what a ‘great relationship’ is. From the guy or gal on the street to the expert with 12 New Your Times best sellers, you hear words like hot, passionate, intimate, close, romantic, and so the list goes on. Now, here’s the truth. The part of your brain that does relationships doesn’t think at all in these terms! That part of your brain uses four feelings as its East, West, North and South to know where it is in a relationship and whether it feels safely loved. The real GPS you can use to tell if you are securely loved uses just four feelings as its emotional compass! What are those feelings you ask? When we feel welcomed with joy, worthy of our needs and nourished, cherished and protected as well as empowered with choice, then we feel deeply loved. If you take away any of those baseline feelings, some part of you will inevitably begin feeling either anxious or avoidant. See, love really isn’t as complicated as it seems!

So throw out your ‘list’ for finding a dream man or woman. That’s nice, but it’s these four feelings that really count. What you really need is an emotional compass attuned to these four feelings to feel more confident in how you pick your partners. They also prove extremely helpful when it comes to navigating any relationship once it gets off the ground. If you add in a consciousness of the six rights or ‘permission slips’ you will need to create lasting love, then you will truly know how to steer your way through the jungle that is often called ‘the dating world’ or your current relationship. You can know where you are on the road of love. If you want to learn what it takes to truly get your needs met in a relationship, or find Mr. or Ms. Right, I delve into all of this in a much deeper way in the TV show interview below.

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